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Post by Glorfindel on Dec 31, 2008 11:58:37 GMT -5
How can you have 6 members log in but only 2 post? This is happening a lot. Come on celebnen, angelsdollstudio, vallyrn, post please.
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Post by tamitha on Dec 31, 2008 18:27:06 GMT -5
Scene 1: The Summons
INT: HALL OF MANDOS - DECORATED CHAMBER - COUNTINUOUS MOVING SHOT: PAN ACROSS LARGE TAPESTRY ON WALL
Depictions of past events are shown. There is a long hallway with a high ceiling connecting with the wall. A strong militaristic figure approaches from the hall. He stops some distance away. Two figures come from opposite corners to greet the figure. Only their backs can be seen. The figure bows and speaks
Eonwë: (to the two who approached) Mistress Nienna and Master Mandos, the hour draws near and the rest of the Valar gather at Mahanaxar.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: The faces of Mandos and Nienna are shown. He looks grimly forward while she looks at him then Eonwë
Nienne: (to Eonwë) Yea Eonwë, we have been expecting thine arrival.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: EONWE - MOUTH OF THE HALLWAY
Eonwë: (to both) Then I respectfully ask, in the name of King Manwë, that the prisoner to be brought to the Ring of Doom.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Mandos does not move. Nienne nods her head slightly and then impatiently addresses Mandos.
Nienna: (to Mandos) Námo, Eonwë has delivered the request.
Mandos: (to Nienna) Yea sister, he has done what he was sent to do.
Nienne: (to Mandos) Námo, shall we not proceed as requested?
ANGLE ON: Mandos looks at the tapestry and then turns partially to motion with his hand for someone.
BACK TO SCENE:
Mandos: (to Nienna) We shall proceed. Tell my wife Vaire, to delay her weaving for a while and come with her husband, for it is time.
Nienna: (to Mandos) Yea brother.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Nienna smiles slightly. ZOOM OUT SLOW: She leaves as two servants, tall and sparkling, approach Mandos and bow
Mandos: (to servants) Fetch him.
INT (CONT'D): The two servants turn and walk down the hall
Mandos: (to Eonwë) It is done Eonwë. We will be there before the mingling of the light.
CUT TO: LONG SHOT: Eonwë bows.
CUT TO: MED SHOT: Mandos looks at the tapestry and frowns. ZOOM IN SLOW: Tapestry; the images of large silver and gold trees.
DISSOLVE:
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Post by tamitha on Dec 31, 2008 18:27:26 GMT -5
Scene 1: The Summons
INT: HALL OF MANDOS - DECORATED CHAMBER - COUNTINUOUS MOVING SHOT: PAN ACROSS LARGE TAPESTRY ON WALL
Depictions of past events are shown. There is a long hallway with a high ceiling connecting with the wall. A strong militaristic figure approaches from the hall. He stops some distance away. Two figures come from opposite corners to greet the figure. Only their backs can be seen. The figure bows and speaks
Eonwë: (to the two who approached) Mistress Nienna and Master Mandos, the hour draws near and the rest of the Valar gather at Mahanaxar.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: The faces of Mandos and Nienna are shown. He looks grimly forward while she looks at him then Eonwë
Nienne: (to Eonwë) Yea Eonwë, we have been expecting thy arrival.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: EONWE - MOUTH OF THE HALLWAY
Eonwë: (to both) Respectfully I ask thee, in the name of King Manwë, that the prisoner to be brought to the Ring of Doom.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Mandos does not move. Nienne nods her head slightly to Eonwe. Mandos continues to study the tapestry unresponsive. Nienna looks at Mandos, after waiting a few moments she impatiently addresses him.
Nienna: (to Mandos) Námo, Eonwë hath delivered the request.
Mandos: (to Nienna, with a coolness in his voice) Yea sister, he hath.
Nienne: (to Mandos, still with impatience) Námo, shall we not proceed as requested?
ANGLE ON: Mandos continues looking at the tapestry for a couple of seconds and then turns partially to motion with his hand for someone.
BACK TO SCENE:
Mandos: (to Nienna, grimly) We shall proceed. Tell my wife Vaire, to delay her weaving. Bid her come unto me, for the time is upon us.
Nienna: (to Mandos) As thou wishest.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Nienna smiles slightly. ZOOM OUT SLOW: She leaves as two servants, tall and sparkling, approach Mandos and bow
Mandos: (to servants, curtly) Fetch him.
INT (CONT'D): The two servants bow again, then turn and walk down the hall
Mandos: (to Eonwë) It is done Eonwë. We will be there before the mingling of the light.
CUT TO: LONG SHOT: Eonwë bows.
CUT TO: MED SHOT: Mandos looks at the tapestry and frowns. ZOOM IN SLOW: Tapestry; the images of large silver and gold trees.
DISSOLVE:
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Post by tamitha on Dec 31, 2008 20:57:58 GMT -5
Overall this scene is fine the way it is.
I made some slight changes example thine arrival to thy arrival, because not the proper pronoun.
Also changed has to hath. We can't switch back and forth. It's like a slip of the tongue and lapsing from speaking "as one would address the president" formally to"talking like you would with boys on the farm". It's not huge, but it stands out. It interrupts the flow.
I already know that you are going to disagree with me, but......I really don't like switching back in forth in the Prologue addressing the One in some places as Eru and other places Iluvatar, but I let it slide because you intentionally made it clear in the introduction of the One that he was known by both names. But in this case Mandos is introduced in the Prologue as Mandos: Melkor was lead away to be held in the Halls of Mandos for three ages...until the appointed time.
I know Eonwe calls him Master Mandos and I know that you are trying to show that this is Nienna's affectionate name for her brother, but I am at least voicing my protest.
Other than that I just added some stage directing or tone of voice that you may or may not agree with.
Oh, one other thing, I think we need to be more specific about what is being shown in the moving shot of the tapestry and what it is that Mandos is pondering. I think we would be seeing through his eyes a depiction of the elves being led by Orme to the sea, then boarding the ships to sail to Aman, and some war scenes between the Valor and orcs and Melkor in the background with the elves in the foreground showing that the Valar were between the elves and Melkor's forces protecting them and coming to rest on Tulkas chaining Melkor. It is a moving shot depending on camera speed (are we getting a glimpse or is it a slow moving pan shot?) we can quickly cover ground alluded to in the Prologue and it will show that a record of all events is being kept.
Just a suggestion and I don't know enough about writing scripts to know how much detail to put in the directions, but I like to know what it is I'm going to be looking at while I'm listening to the words. If any actors/actresses show up (Hello out there!) or some artists/animators (Hello out there!) it would be really nice to have their input on how they would portray these characters or some of the scenery taking place during the acting.
By the way I really like the idea of a tapestry or at the very least a wall painting. Like what we saw on Elrond's walls in Rivendell. We didn't get a close look, it was just a glimpse, but it served the purpose to show that a record was being kept and highlighted artistry and paintings of events. Well done!
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Post by tamitha on Dec 31, 2008 23:11:30 GMT -5
I'll have to look back at LoTR but I think I remember that Pippin's relationship (or how they are related) to Frodo is not addressed until they are at the "Prancing Pony". Before then, you just assume that they are friends or close relatives that care for one another and move on (they also cut Fatty out altogether).
You are very correct about this. Kudos.
Gandalf's rescue by Thorondor is glossed over as to the complete past connection (they don't even have Thorondor speak). Just who Aragorn is happens many scenes after his intro into the story. It's not until the Rivendel council that his complete identity is revealed.
This is very true as well. And the first time I watched the movie(s) I was quite stunned and a bit lost as I had never read the books at that time and didn't know the significance of Gondor or the white tree. Gandalf's "death" was a shock too, but even more so was his return for I thought as did Merry, Pippin, Legolas, Aragorn and Gimli that the "White Wizard" was Sauramon. Very good points about "not giving too much away too soon."
Have you seen "The Prestige"?
No, I have not.
In the movie "The Dark Knight", you don't even know where the Joker comes from or who he really is. Yet the character and story are both compelling.
Finally saw this just a few days ago. And yes, you never really know anything about the Joker other than he just is. Everytime he tells his story about how he "got those scars" he tells something different so you never really know how it is that he came to be the derranged individual that he is.
Whopee Whoohoo Bells & Whistles Happy New Year! Farewell 2008! Welcome 2009!
(I know, you are in a different time zone. It's midnight for me, but I think only 10:00 for you, but the ball just dropped in New York so it's "officially" 2009) ;D
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Post by Glorfindel on Jan 2, 2009 9:21:36 GMT -5
Happy 2009! I hope that your New Year's night was okay. I made some slight changes example thine arrival to thy arrival, because not the proper pronoun. Sorry about my lack of focus on the formal pronouns and verbs. It took a while just to get my head around using them at all. I like how it flows now. Nice touches. I already know......I really don't like switching back in forth in the Prologue addressing the One in some places as Eru and other places Iluvatar....But in this case Mandos is introduced in the Prologue as Mandos: Melkor was lead away to be held in the Halls of Mandos for three ages...until the appointed time. Yes, I can see your point but you have to remember that Gandalf in the book and movies is called by different names. Also Sauron is the "Dark Lord" and "The Lord of the Rings". Mandos is kind of like a title in a way and Namo "is" his name. The elves and others came to refer to him as Mandos but I would think that his sister and maybe his wife would call him by his true name. If you think it would be "too confusing" it can be changed. I was using the name as a way to convey relationship and character. I don't think the audience will be thrown off by it. Other than that I just added some stage directing or tone of voice that you may or may not agree with. I'll look at it again closely but nothing jumped out at me as being out of sorts on your edits. Your changes seem to be okay. ...we need to be more specific about what is being shown in the moving shot of the tapestry and what it is that Mandos is pondering. I think we would be seeing through his eyes...is a moving shot depending on camera speed...we can quickly cover ground alluded to in the Prologue and it will show that a record of all events is being kept. Yes, it can have more detail and should. The shot is slow and moving and allowing you to see the past events. The brevity of certain events in the prologue could be made up in the tapestry viewing. Just a suggestion and I don't know enough about writing scripts to know how much detail to put in the directions. The original script should have "no" directions other than very, very basic info, like mentioning if it is an interior or exterior shot. What I've tried to do, is make a "shooting" script. The cinematographer, director, set designer, and maybe the person doing location scouting would influence what that final shooting script would look like. From examples on the web, some have bus loads of info and some don't. I think the story boards would help out on this but I haven't finished them. I'll try to post my rough sketches up next week (need to get to a scanner) of the first few scenes. By the way I really like the idea of a tapestry or at the very least a wall painting. Like what we saw on Elrond's walls in Rivendell...
I liked the Rivendel painting also. I've seen this done in other movies too; shots of hieroglyphs on the wall of a tomb and the like. Thanks for the changes and feed back. I'll be working on the story boards and other things this weekend if time permits.
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Post by tamitha on Jan 2, 2009 13:58:57 GMT -5
Okay, I'm going to give it a rest. I will wait to see what new and interesting things you do with the prologue. It seems we are in agreement on Scene 1 other than possibly adding more details (or not assuming we leave that others). Scene 2 needs revisions based upon our agreements. I'll take a look at that at some point and post my version and see what you think.
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Post by silmaril on Jan 5, 2009 6:32:42 GMT -5
Well, one way to work in both of Eru's names smoothly would be to do it like the book. Basically, 'Before all else there was Eru, who on Arda is called Iluvatar.' Or, 'In the beginning was Eru, who in the Elvish tongue is named Iluvatar.' making a reference to Elvish/the elves might make a familiar area for the movie goers. like hearing someone speak in a foreign language and suddenly hear a word you know. but that's just my two cents worth.
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Post by tamitha on Jan 5, 2009 12:17:39 GMT -5
Before all else is Eru, the One, and in him all that is originated. He is Iluvatar, the father of all, and from him came the Ainur which were the offspring of his thoughts.He already did it the way you suggested. This has been an ongoing debate between he and I. That is why I said I already knew he wasn't going to agree with me. And he makes valid points. Gollum is also called Smeagol. Strider is also called Aragorn. Gandalf is called Gandalf the Grey, Gandalf the White, Mithrandir, among other things. I'm not going to make a big deal out of it. I was just reminding him that I don't necessarily think it is a good idea to switch back and forth. Once Strider was introduced as Aragorn, then they stuck with Aragorn and didn't revert back to calling him Strider. It's just a pet peeve. But thank you for your input. We are open to all the help we can get.
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Post by Glorfindel on Jan 5, 2009 13:09:41 GMT -5
Once Strider was introduced as Aragorn, then they stuck with Aragorn and didn't revert back to calling him Strider...
Well, not Sam, Sam calls him Strider just about the whole book/movies. Not a biggie as you mentioned. Thanks for your imput silmaril.
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Post by Glorfindel on Jan 5, 2009 13:58:00 GMT -5
THE SILMARILLION: Fall of the Noldor
BLACK SCREEN
SUPER: SILMFILM PRESENTS
SUPER: A SILMARILLION FILM PROJECT PRODUCTION
AUDIO F/X: Sound of wind blowing softly
SUPER: THE SILMARILLION: The Fall of the Noldor
EXT: DARK STARRY NIGHT SKY
PROLOGUE:
GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Indeed, many things have been regarded as wonders of the world, but none could match the Silmarils, that were made in a time now ancient. These holy jewels were above all other creations of the elder days. Far beyond the skills of mortal men. Even beyond the skill of any elf, save the one who brought them forth. (time now ancient to allow "ages" to be used in the next line (no dupilcates), also Silmarils presented first, then "holy jewels")
ISOLATE: three sparkling objects that are being held by a male elf and are covered by a decorated cloth.
Remove the shot of the covered Silmarils and fade in to show a beautiful garden at night.
DISSOLVE: EXT: LUSH GARDEN - MIRROR OF GALADRIEL - NIGHT
GALADRIEL (O.S.V.)
Come look into the mirror and learn of the deeds of the past. See the beginning, long ages before Sauron and the Ring of Power. For what started in joy, turned to woe and tears unnumbered. I know, for I was there when doom fell on the Noldor. (minor changes-rewording)
ZOOM IN: MIRROR/BASIN - Water in basin reflects stars, goes black, and then shows three points of light below a dark horizon
GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Fëanor, the son of King Finwë, had in him a spirit more fiery than has ever been known among the elves either before or after. In craft he had no rival, and so it was he who made the precious Silmarils that were both magnificent and pure. Their worth cannot be told. There were some who obsessed over the beautiful of the gems and greedy lust filled their hearts. The 'Black Enemy' was chief among those who's ambition to possess them, sullied the joy they were intended to bring. He was the mightiest among the powers of the world and hated Feanor more than any other elf and attempted to force his will on others even before the world was created.[/color] .(minor changes-rewording, "King" added Thus..etc, plus Melkor alluded to more directly)
DISSOLVE: EXT: Burning set of "eyes" are superimposed over the top of Feanor and Finwe causing their image to waver and fade away. The "eyes" blaze red and then fade to black. Then the reflection of stars return and the camera moves into the starry sky. MOVING SHOT: Through star field to a black plane. (Eyes (Melkor's))
GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Before all else, is who the elves call Eru, the One, and in him all that is originated. He is Iluvatar, the father of all, and from him came the Ainur which were the offspring of his thoughts.
EXT: (CONT'D): The plane grays, a white light appears. It has a changing color pattern. Small lights spiral out shaded with color but are mostly white. They pulsate with visible sound waves and orbit the white light. The large white light starts to take a humanoid shape
GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Eru set forth a theme and bid the Ainur to sing the song of creation, but the mightiest of his holy ones, Melkor, wove discord into the song. He desired to place into the song his own ambitions and will. (minor changes-rewording)
ANGLE ON: Largest of the lesser lights becomes dim, red and pulsates faster; the sound waves become jagged.
BACK TO SCENE GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Eru's mastery overtook all that Melkor attempted, commandeering Melkor’s notes for his own themes. (minor changes-rewording)
LONG SHOT: Sound waves blend together and then a big pulse of light washes out all of the waves. The bright figure leads the lights to a skewed image of the world.
GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Eru revealed Arda, the world created by the song, where he would bring forth his children, elves and men. The greatest of the Ainur, the Valar, powers of the world, came to dwell in Arda to prepare it before the awakening his children. (minor changes-rewording)
DISSOLVE: SURFACE OF PROMORDIAL EARTH - STORMY - NIGHT. Meteors impact in the distance. Lightning strikes and bright clouds descend to the ground. Forms, like Eru but smaller, rise from the strikes and impacts.
GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Melkor was there for he was indeed Valar but he worked against the will of Iluvatar and marred the land with such cruelty that all other Valar were forced to take refuge in Aman far across the great sea in the region of Valinor.
DISSOLVE: EXT: OCEAN - TWILIGHT MOVING SHOT: Across the ocean to a pristine beach and then rich green pastures
GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) There Yavanna crafted the two trees which provided the light of Aman. Watered by the tears of Nienna, the trees of Valinor grew in beauty and grace.(minor changes-rewording)
CUT TO: EXT: VALINOR - GREEN HILL - TWILIGHT LONG SHOT: Yavanna stands with hands out toward trees. Nienna kneels while they grow and bloom. Show one to be silver and lesser light that grows brighter and dims, show one to be gold and a greater light that grows brighter and dims alternate of the silver tree, this will show the mingling light as one grows brighter and the other dims.
GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) The Valar did not forget the coming of the elves, first born of Iluvatar. And so it was that Varda put bright stars in the heavens for them.
EXT: GLITTERING POOLS - GREEN HILL - TREE LIGHT MED. SHOT: Two arms dip into a pool. Hands are lifted to the sky. They sparkle like glitter and stars slowly appear.
GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Soon after Iluvatar awoke the elves, Oromë, the hunter, went forth to invite them to the Blessed Realm, away from Melkor who had struck terror in their hearts. (minor changes-rewording)(I don't know all the fancy stage language, but could we like have a shot of Melkor kidnapping an elf that wandered away from Cuivenen here? It will not only support the above line, but will also support their fear and wonder of Orme)
CUT TO:
EXT: CUIVIENEN (LAKE) - TWILIGHT CLOSE UP: Sparks jump from Nahar's hoofs as he goes up a ridge that over looks a camp of elves
CUT TO:
LONG SHOT: Elves look in wonder and fear at Oromë on Nahar.
GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Melkor's efforts to hinder the elves' journey through Middle-earth posed a threat too great to go unchallenged. The Valar rose up to battle and Melkor's army was defeated. Mighty Tulkas then bound Melkor with a great chain that was made by Aulë. (minor changes-rewording)
INT: MED. SHOT: Utumno - Hall - Dark Tulkas is seen with his knee on the back of Melkor, holding him, and locking the chain.
GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Melkor was lead away to be held in the Halls of Mandos for three ages...until the appointed time.
DISSOLVE: INT: From Melkor and Tulkas to a beautiful large tapestry depicting that event in the Halls of Mandos. Don't get the chance to make any more adjustments than these. I think that you can see where I'm going. Does it flow enough and point to the Feanor vs. Melkor conflict adequately?
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Post by silmaril on Jan 6, 2009 3:29:50 GMT -5
Scene: 3 - The Ring of Doom
FADE IN: EXT: STREETS OF VALMAR NEAR THE GOLD GATES LONG SHOT: The host of Oromë on horseback is revealed coming down the main street. At the last intersection near the gates is a large fountain, Ulmo rises out of its waters with horns sounding. Oromë halts.
AUDIO/FX: Horses and Ulmo's Horn heard
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: OROME AND ULMO
Oromë: (to Ulmo) Hail, Lord Ulmo. Not oft is the Lord of waters seen in Valimar or elsewhere in Aman. It has been ages since I have seen the one who helped me bring the Eldar here.
Ulmo: (to Oromë) It has been a long time since I was last here, for work remains in Middle Earth and aid is needed for the Eldar there. Then the younger children are soon to come.
MOVING SHOT: Ulmo turns and walks beside Oromë. They travel down the street and through the Golden Gate.
Oromë: (to Ulmo, thinking) Yes, the after-born. They are soon to come to Middle Earth without any direct aid from us, though they might need it. It makes this council an even more interesting matter.
Ulmo: (to Oromë, grim) I almost repent that I helped thee in the bringing forth of the Eldar here, as I almost repent that I have come to the Ring of Doom this day.
Oromë: (to Ulmo, grim) We are in total agreement on the latter.
EXT (CONT'D): Elves bow and greet the Valar as they approach the entrance into Mahanaxar. The two enter in.
CUT TO: EXT: GREEN PLAIN NEAR MAHANAXAR LONG SHOT: Across the plain on a path are seen Nienna, Vaire with Melkor behind them and Mandos behind him.
DISSOLVE: EXT: ENTERANCE INTO MAHANAXAR Elves near by smile and greet Nienna and Vaire but they are silent as Melkor passes. His raiment is worn and his face is covered from view. He is slumped over.
CUT TO: INT: MAHANAXAR "THE RING OF DOOM" - CONTINUOUS LONG SHOT: The Valar settle into their positions.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Eonwë stands in front and speaks
Eonwë: (to all) Today, as appointed in ages past, Melkor comes forth, Ainur and once...Vala!
CUT TO: INT (CONT'D): ENTRANCE OF MAHANAXAR MED. SHOT: In entrance Melkor stands, his head bowed with the others behind him. Vaire touches Mandos; goes to be seated.
Eonwë: O.S.V. (to Melkor) Melkor, abide in the ring.
CUT TO: LONG SHOT: Melkor goes slowly to the ring's center with the noise of the chain.
Eonwë: O.S.V. (to Melkor) It was appointed that thou dwell in the Halls of Mandos for three ages as punishment for rebelling against Iluvatar’s will, which thou marred the works that were done in his name by the Valar. Has this sentence been completed?
CUT TO: MED SHOT: MANDOS
Mandos: (to Eonwë, Manwë) I, Lord of the Halls of Waiting, certify his captivity.
CUT TO: MED SHOT: EONWE
Eonwë: (to Melkor) Melkor, what say thou now of thy dark ambitions?
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Melkor looks up and reveals his face clearly for the first time as he looks at Manwë
Melkor: (to all, hesitant) What do I say? I say this...I have caused great harm to Arda. Much has been destroyed because of a jealous heart... that did not completely...comprehend.
CLOSE UP (CONT'D): Melkor moves toward Manwë with the chain dragging and making loud noises
Melkor: (to Manwë) Brother, if thou would allow me to remain. I beg thee, Manwë, that thee hear my plea. Just make me the least of the free people in Aman.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: MANWE AND VARDA Manwe is in deep thought as is Varda seated next to him.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Melkor drops to his knees
Melkor: (to Manwë, to all) I will aid ye in all ye works, and in the healing of the many hurts that I caused in my arrogance.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: PAN: Valar in silence, then one laughs and keeps on until it's revealed to be Tulkas. ISOLATE: TULKAS
Tulkas: (to Melkor) Thou find the ground easily now to beg pardon. It was not so when we last met, but a task that I was glad to help thee achieve. (to Valar) Should we lend ear to the one who tried to lead so many astray? Even as we sang the song of Eru for the creation of the world, he was attempting to sow discord with his every note!
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: NIENNE
Nienne: (to Tulkas) Tulkas, his heart has changed through years of anguish and regret while in my brother’s halls.
ZOOM OUT SLOW: TWO SHOT: Nienne looks at Mandos next to her as he stares forward, saying nothing; she continues
Nienne: (turning to the other Valar) I know, for I have spoken to him often and have witnessed his torment. I believe his heart is truly grieved.
CUT TO: MED SHOT: TULKAS
Tulkas: (to Nienna) Grieved?!
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: NIENNA - welling up with tears
Nienna: (to Tulkas) Yes, grieved for all the harm and hurt that has been done, for the crimes committed and for the loss, of, so many...
CUT TO: LONG SHOT: TULKAS - talking and using his hands to talk
Tulkas: (to Nienna, chuckling) Ah, grieved alright! He is grieved that his plans fell through, grieved that he did not turn more Ainur to his dark path, and grieved that Tulkas descended into the world to help bring about his defeat!
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: YAVANNA - stands up quickly, intense
Yavanna: (to Tulkas) Enough! I too have witness the atrocities of Melkor, but thou are the one now in danger of sowing discord. This is no simple matter for any and it strikes deep in the heart of all who labored long in preparation for the coming of Iluvatar's children. Strife of the past does lie between us, but we must strive to become a reconciled people so that peace may be achieved. Would not Eru Iluvatar himself want this?
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: TULKAS
Tulkas: (to Nienna) I am, regretful, for the tone and vigor in which I spoke to thee, Nienna. I did not mean...I would not want thee to...
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: NIENNA - comes in frame, next to Tulkas
Nienna: (to Tulkas, kind) Don’t be troubled Tulkas Astaldo. I will not hold thy words spoken in passion against thee; but should we be more forgiving to all and extend pardon to those who ask it?
INT: Silent for a few seconds as the Valar contemplate, then with a clear and powerful voice, Manwë speaks
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: THRONE OF MANWE
Manwë: (to Melkor) Melkor...rise.
CUT TO: LONG SHOT: MELKOR - gets up off of his knees
Manwë: (to all) One thing rings true and shines pure as the light of the two trees mingled this very hour. Yavanna is correct. Iluvatar did intend for all of his holy ones to work together in doing his will here in Arda. Would I refuse one that is willing now to accept this truth, although it took bitter learning and chastisement to realize it? Melkor, I grant thee pardon. Thou will be given the opportunity to help heal the wounds that were inflicted during thy days of error. There are some who may perceive thy freedom as somewhat, premature; so thy freedom has the condition that thou stay within the limits of Valimar until otherwise given leave.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: MELKOR
Melkor: (to Manwë) Gladly will I do all that thou bid me do, gladly.
ZOOM OUT: He bows to one knee and stands back up.
CUT TO: LONG SHOT: EONWE - standing on steps near Manwë
Eonwë: (to all) Harken ye in Mahanaxar, the Ring of Doom. Let it be known in all of Aman that the decree has gone forth from King Manwë Sulimo, that Melkor be pardon and set free within the limits of Valmar this very hour.
CUT TO: LONG SHOT: PAN VALAR Silence as everyone now looks at Melkor and then at Aulë
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: AULE Aulë sits on the far side of the ring. His hand is stroking his chin and he is deep in thought, half-paying attention to what’s going on. He is nudged by Yavanna with a smile.
Aulë: (in Melkor's direction) Oh my! I had almost forgotten about you.
MOVING SHOT: Aulë walks over and stands next to Melkor. He grabs the chain on Melkor to study it closely.
Aulë: (to himself) Ah yes, Angainor, I had forgot about thee and the labor it took to get thee just right. Let us see, what was the correct combination of ore in the making of Tilkal alloy? I think the hardest thing was maintaining the temperature...
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Aulë looks over and sees Melkor’s strangely blank face with just one eyebrow raised.
Melkor: (to Aulë) Do go on, Lord Aulë.
Aulë: (to Melkor) Well, perhaps another time, maybe.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: MOVING SHOT: Aulë unlocks the chain and it comes off hitting the ground with a thud.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Manwë greets Melkor. A few of the other Valar come by and briefly greet Melkor but not Tulkas, Oromë, or Ulmo.
DISSOLVE: LONG SHOT: Melkor makes for the exit with a few Valar watching him in the distance. Ulmo approaches Manwë and Varda
Ulmo: (to Manwë) A generous and righteous thing to do, but was it wisest?
Manwë: (to Ulmo) I believe so friend, I pray to Eru that all will be well.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Melkor walks toward the gate, standing tall with new raiment on.
ANGLE ON: His eyes are dark red and appear to be like hot coals and flames in a furnace.
DISSOLVE:
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Post by silmaril on Jan 6, 2009 3:33:43 GMT -5
i just have to say that i love the idea of using the tapestries for transitions. there was a version of little match girl i used to watch on tv that used that transitioning style to break for/come back from commercials and i have always loved it. (if done smoothly.) one thing i think that would be interesting for the end of scene three, since the next scene is feanor's forge, would be to do an extreme close up on melkor's eye and then pan out from a 'coal' in the forge. (wasn't sure if i should copy both scene's or none, so just copied 3 to have a reference point. and yes, i am bad at remembering to capitalize when i'm typing, i apologize. )
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Post by Glorfindel on Jan 6, 2009 10:06:52 GMT -5
Melkor's eyes to a burning coal; that's where we are headed. I do like tapestries very much, I can't remember from what movie I pulled it from, but it's been done in one fashion or another a few times and can be compelling if done right. Don't worry about the caps for now. At least you are posting and I'm so happy about that!
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Post by Glorfindel on Jan 28, 2009 11:13:46 GMT -5
Just had a crazy idea about the prologue. What if we...didn't have one?! What if the film opened to a shot of the tapestry illustrations of the past events with just a minimal intro from Galadriel? I know that risk not giving enough detail to equip the viewers for the first couple of scenes, but would it be worth the risk? I will post a condense "very rough" draft of this idea below. Open to a BLACK SCREEN CONT'D SUPER TITLE FADE: SILMFILM PRESENTS SUPER TITLE FADE: A SILMARILLION FILM PROJECT PRODUCTION SUPER TITLE FADE: THE SILMARILLION: The Fall of the Noldor BLACK SCREEN CONT'D GALADRIEL (Off Screen Voice) Many things have been regarded as wonders of the world, but none could match the Silmarils, that were made in a time now ancient. These holy jewels were above all other creations of the elder days. Far beyond the skills of all, save one. DISSOLVE: EXT: STARRY NIGHT - CLUSTER OF BRIGHT STARS. GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) I will tell you of these great and terrible deeds of the past, long ages before Sauron and the Ring of Power. For what started in joy, turned to woe and tears unnumbered. I know, for I was there when doom fell on the Noldor. ZOOM OUT SLOW: Pulling away from the cluster of stars. DISSOLVE: Bright candles and lamps in a great room connected by many large hallways. GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Fëanor, the son of King Finwë, had in him a spirit more fiery than has ever been known among the elves. In craft he had no rival, and so it was he who made the precious Silmarils that were both magnificent and pure. ZOOM IN SLOW: A very large and beatiful tapestry on the wall of the great room showing past historical events including King Finwe together with his son Feanor. GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Some obsessed over the beautiful of the gems and greedy lust filled their hearts. The 'Black Enemy' was chief among those who's ambition to possess them, sullied the joy they were intended to bring. He hated Feanor more than any other elf and attempted to force his will on others even before the world was created...from the begining. CUT TO: Burning set of "eyes" in a dark cloud which has been woven into the tapestry. GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Before all else, is who the elves call Eru, the One, and in him all that is originated. He is Iluvatar, the father of all, and the offspring of his thoughts were the Ainur, the Valar, which are the powers of the world. CUT TO: The begining of the tapesrty with the dipection of a great white light with smaller lights spiraling out from it, shaded with color. GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Eru set forth a theme and bid them to sing the song of creation, but the mightiest of his holy ones, Melkor, wove discord into the song. He desired to place into the song his own ambitions and will. At last Eru's mastery overtook all that Melkor attempted, commandeering Melkor’s notes for his own themes and the world, Arda, was created. CON'T SHOT SCROLLING: The bright figure with small points of lights look on at an image of the world. GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Eru revealed Arda, the world created by the song, where he would bring forth his children, elves and men. The powers of the world, came to dwell in Arda to prepare it before the awakening his children. CON'T SHOT SCROLLING: a woven depiction of a promordial earth at night with storms. Meteors impact, lightning strikes and bright clouds descend to the ground are shown. Forms, like Eru but smaller, rise from the strikes and impacts. GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Melkor was there but he worked against the will of Iluvatar and marred the land with such cruelty that all other Valar were forced to take refuge in Aman far across the great sea. Soon after Iluvatar awoke the elves; they were invited to the Blessed Realm, away from Melkor who had struck terror in their hearts. CON'T SHOT SCROLLING: Woven images of dark beasts attacking the elves in the woods of Middle-earth. A bright rider on a beatiful horse talking to three elf leaders. GALADRIEL (O.S.V.) Melkor's efforts to hinder the elves' journey through Middle-earth posed a threat too great to go unchallenged. The Valar rose up to battle and Melkor's army was defeated. He then was bound with a great chain and was lead away to be held in the Halls of Waiting for three ages...until the appointed time. CON'T SHOT SCROLLING: Woven depiction of Utumno. Melkor is face down with a strong figure holding him down and locking a great chain about him. CUT TO: Scene 1: The Summons I thought I could cut it down further but I felt like I was leaving out too much already. A lot about the Valar and the song could be picked up in the ring of doom. The trees would be explained later on in detail too. Using the tapestry could also help in the animation process providing a jump start because "its not animated". It is a drawing which is being scrolled over and/or sections cut to. Also you would not have to worry about how "the song of creation" would sound like. Anyway, this was just an idea, a test. I still like a longer more detailed version but a shorter one may work. What say you?
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