|
Post by Glorfindel on Dec 3, 2010 9:49:39 GMT -5
FINAL VERSION
Scene: 18 - Repercussions at Fëanor's Forge
DISSOLVE: INT: Fëanor's Forge MED. SHOT: Fëanor is admiring the silmarils. He hears a faint knock on the door. He locks the jewels up, goes and opens the door with hand on sword hilt. It is Nerdanel looking upset
Fëanor: (to Nerdanel) What in Eru's name do you want Nerdanel?
Nerdanel: (to Fëanor, serious) You must go back and apologize. What you have done...
Fëanor: (to Nerdanel, interrupting) I should have done much sooner and left a mark on Fingolfin's neck as a reminder.
Nerdanel: (to Fëanor, dismayed) Cease your mad talk and reconcile this situation! All of Tirion is up in arms about this with vicious gossip and vile rumor spreading everywhere!
Fëanor: (to Nerdanel, grim laugh) Ha, I will not.
Nerdanel: (to Fëanor, upset) Why Fëanor? Why did you do such a thing?!
Fëanor: (to Nerdanel, coldly) My brother needed to be put in his place. Is it too hard for you to see that?
Nerdanel: (to Fëanor) All I see is envy and selfishness.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Fëanor upset
Fëanor: (to Nerdanel) Then you are truly blind, more than I once thought. My brother desires to replace the House of Fëanor with the House of Fingolfin along with Finarfin as his lackey!
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Fëanor and Nerdanel
Nerdanel: (to Fëanor) He has never made such a claim or acted in such a manner. How did you get this idea?
Fëanor: (to Nerdanel) I caught him in the act when I arrived at my father’s door. He and that mother of his have always tried to gain influence over my father. She was so low to play on Finwë's grief to trick him into marriage. Now her two base sons have hope of gaining all his authority.
Nerdanel: (to Fëanor) Fëanor, stop with this reckless talk! Don't be foolish!
Fëanor: (to Nerdanel) Of all the opportunities you have had to come to my door, you venture here as an agent on their behalf?! How dare you come in here and defend them! You have truly proven to be weak and unworthy.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Nerdanel
Nerdanel: (to Fëanor, near tears) How can you speak of unworthiness? You care for none who do not continually praise you for your creations. You neglect all but wish them to fall in line with every whim that you proclaim. Now you have out done yourself in acts of selfishness and dishonor.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Aulë comes in with haste; grim.
Aulë: (to Fëanor) I have come to get the news from thee Fëanor, and not second hand. What has happened?
Fëanor: (to Aulë, cold smile) Clarity was ushered in Lord Aulë; that is all.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Aulë
Aulë: (to Fëanor, concerned) Fëanor, the account is on its way up the Holy Mountain Taniquetil. I would like to help resolve this before Manwë inquires, but thou must let me know what is going on.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: All Three
Nerdanel: (to Aulë) The mighty Fëanor has added to his fame. He is now the disturber of harmony and one who threatens his brother....
Fëanor: (to Nerdanel, very angry) Enough! Let Manwë send summons to me if he wills it. For now, please leave me.
Nerdanel: (to Fëanor) With pleasure, I am overly weary trying to help someone that apparently needs no help.
MED. SHOT CONT'D: Nerdanel leaves quickly out of the door.
Aulë: (to Fëanor) Fëanor, why take strife and nurse it along?
MED. SHOT CONT'D: Aulë leaves and closes the door. Fëanor stares for a moment and then sits and looks at the box containing the silmarils. There is a loud noise at the door.
PAN TO: Doorway with Eonwë standing there.
FADE TO BLACK:
|
|
|
Post by Glorfindel on Dec 21, 2010 12:03:48 GMT -5
THE FINAL VERSION
Scene: 19 - Fëanor's Banishment
FADE IN: INT: RING OF DOOM LONG SHOT: Valar are assembled PAN ACROSS: Valar, Maiar and a small group of elves that include Fëanor's brothers near the entrance. Fëanor comes in with all his sons and Finwë. Finwë stand behind him.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Eonwë before Manwë and Varda facing the group
Eonwë: (to all) Here is Fëanor, known also as Curufinwë, the son of King Finwë of the Noldor. He is the maker of the blessed Silmarils.
MED. SHOT CONT'D: Eonwë moves to allow Mandos to approach
Mandos: (to Fëanor) It is known to us of thy actions in Tirion against thy own kin, thy brother no less. With weapon in hand, thou threaten his life. These witnesses testify of the incident. What say thou of the charge?
CUT TO: MED SHOT: Mandos, Fëanor, and Finwë
Fëanor: (to Mandos, to all) I have done many things with passion and courage; you can add that account to the list.
Mandos: (to Fëanor) Thou know well Fëanor; that such an action is unlawful and is of no small matter.
Fëanor: (to Mandos, to all) Are my actions to be the only ones examined, when many have aided in bringing forth this hour at hand? As you well know, I work alone in peaceful solitude, but this was not achieved by myself solely.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Manwë and Varda
Varda: (to Fëanor) What do thou speak of Fëanor?
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Fëanor
Fëanor: (to all) I say that my brothers seek to have their own positions improved up on. They error in their design to achieve this, yet can any blame them for their desire to do so? We are all held in a land fair and pleasant, yes, but it lacks opportunity for those that were designed for larger realms.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Yavanna and Aulë
Yavanna: (to Fëanor) Larger realms son of Finwë? Wise were the Eldar to heed the invitation and come to Aman.
Fëanor: (to all) It did seem wise to the then ambassadors of the elves at the time, but as many ages have past, it is apparent that we were meant for far greater than what can be found here in Aman. We have achieved much, and have graduated from the lowly apprentices that we once were. Is not the land of Middle-earth now safe for our return? If it is not, why does it remain so after these many years? If it is safe, why do you advise us to tarry here longer? Is there some secret knowledge left for you to impart on such a great people as the Noldor; greater than the Silmarils that I have created? Even one of your own agrees with me.
CUT TO: MED SHOT: Nienna standing between Lorien and Mandos
Nienna: (to Fëanor) One of the Valar speaks this?
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Fëanor
Fëanor: (to all) Yes, Lord Melkor has spoken with the Noldor often and concurs with much of what I say.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Oromë and Tulkas
Oromë: (getting upset, to Fëanor, then Manwë) Melkor spoke to thy people about Middle-earth? King Manwë, thou hear of this intrigue?
Tulkas: (to Fëanor, frowning) What of Melkor and his words Noldo?
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Fëanor, Finwe, Maedhros, Maglor
Fëanor: (to Oromë, to all) He has echoed things that I long suspected, and relieved much about Middle-earth that many have kept silent about.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Manwë
Manwë: (sadden, to Tulkas) Tulkas, be off and find him.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Tulkas looks at Manwë and bows quickly leaving in a flash. Everyone is talking and uneasy.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Manwë
Manwë: (to Fëanor, then Mandos) The root has been uncovered so now we may draw the proper conclusion. Melkor is to blame for the majority of this resent strife, yet Fëanor is not without fault. Although Melkor has put forth words of confusion and intrigue to cause division, thou, Fëanor, thy actions against thy brother are still grossly wrong. Mandos, proceed.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Mandos in front of Fëanor and Finwë who stand separated from everyone
Mandos: (to Fëanor) Thou spoke to Fingolfin about thralldom, but if this condition is so, then thou cannot escape it for Manwë Súlimo is High King of all of Arda. Thy actions were unlawful here and would equally be so anywhere else in the world. Judgment is now upon you. Thy doom is banishment from Tirion where this act took place for the space of twelve years. After which, there will be opportunity to set this matter aside in peace, if your brother Fingolfin releases thee from further debt.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Fingolfin steps forward.
Fingolfin: (to all) I shall make it known now; I do release my brother Fëanor.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Eonwë in front of the seated Manwë and Varda
Eonwë: (to all) Judgment has been given that Fëanor will be banished from Tirion for twelve years. The lies of Melkor have been uncovered and he may seek to escape Aman; let all who see him report to the Valar so that he may be brought to answer for his devious offences.
CUT TO: LONG SHOT: Fëanor goes towards the exit with his sons and Finwë
DISSOLVE: TRANSITION:
|
|
|
Post by Glorfindel on Dec 22, 2010 12:44:05 GMT -5
FINAL VERSION
Scene: 20 - Reports and Briefings
TRANSITION SHOT: MONTAGE SEQUENCE: King Olwë’s mansion: Large ornate double doors open to reveal Galadriel and her brothers. They are warmly greeted by Olwë and other elves of Alqualonde.
TRANSITION: King Finwë’s mansion: Finwë saluting farewell to his sad faced servants who are lined up in a long hallway. He then hugs Fingolfin and Finarfin near the end of the line. He lastly hugs and kisses a very sad Indis before he leaves out through a nearby exit.
TRANSITION: Fëanor’s Forge in Tirion: Fëanor is packing various items into boxes with Celegrom, Caranthir, and Curufin helping. Huan is watchful at the door.
TRANSITION: Tirion busy streets: Turgon and Elenwë smiling at each other and walking slowly, hand in hand, passing busy shops.
TRANSITION: Aulë’s Forge: Mahtan looks on as Nerdanel puts the finishing touches on a beautiful necklace.
TRANSITION: The entrance of Formenos: Elves working on the paved entry way, heavy door, and grounds at Formenos as Fëanor looks on with the Silmarils on his brow.
TRANSITION: MONTAGE END: LONG SHOT: MOVING SHOT: From the Calacirya through to Tirion and then up Taniquetil. ZOOM IN: MED. SHOT: Finrod is walking up the nicely paved road to the gates of Manwë’s and Varda’s mansion. Amarië is near the gates in the distance, talking to a group of Vanyar elves. She notices Finrod and says goodbye to the Vanyar elves and walks toward Finrod.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Finrod and Amarië
Amarië: (to Finrod) Hello my love. Was your journey pleasant?
Finrod: (smiling, to Amarië) Yes Amarië. Knowing that the end result is being with you makes any journey pleasant.
Amarië: (smiling back, to Finrod) I am so blessed to have someone that would travel far to see me. It is unfortunate that my duties do not allow me to leave the holy mountain very often.
CUT TO: MED SHOT: They hold hands and start to walk over to a bench near a fountain by the road
Finrod: (to Amarië) You are also blessed to be so cherished and needed in the service of your kin and the Valar.
MED SHOT CONT’D: As they sit, they are startled by a loud pounding noise getting closer.
CUT TO: WIDE SHOT: Tulkas comes up from around the curve of the road running very fast. The Vanyar elves quickly open the gates for him and he swiftly passes through.
CUT TO: MOVING SHOT: The back of the head and shoulders of Tulkas as he makes his way through several courtyards filled with Vanyar elves and Maiar, into the grand hall, past the great atrium, and into the most central chamber of the mansion. Oromë is seated next to Nienna and Mandos is standing near Manwë and Varda who are on throne like chairs. There are a handful of Vanyar elves singing softly in a far corner of the room.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Oromë
Oromë: (to Tulkas) So there thou are finally.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Tulkas
Tulkas: (to Oromë, laughing) Ha, it is no labor for thee to patrol, since poor Nahar puts forth all the effort of hauling thee around. Certainly thou saw me approaching from afar.
CUT TO: MED SHOT: Oromë, Nienna, Mandos
Oromë: (to Tulkas, smiling] Yea, we notice thee skipping and hopping through the fields.
MED. SHOT CONT'D: Oromë laughs, Nienna smiles slightly, Mandos raises an eyebrow.
CUT TO: LONG SHOT: Yavanna and Aulë arrive. Aulë looks slightly worried and/or embarrassed.
Yavanna: (to all) Apologies for our delay, someone would not leave their work.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Manwë and Varda
Manwë: (to Aulë) No need for apologies; this is not a formal meeting; just a short briefing on things.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Oromë, Tulkas, Yavanna and Aulë
Oromë: (to all) There has not been any sighting of Melkor in almost five years Elder King, unless Tulkas has had tidings otherwise.
Tulkas: (to all) No news I am afraid and no reports have come from the sea. Ulmo has not seen him.
Yavanna: (to all) I have seen no evidence of his presence nor has Lorien in the gardens.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Manwë
Manwë: (to all) I will take his absence as a blessing, and hope that he has truly departed Aman.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Nienna and Mandos
Nienna: (to Manwë) I pray that thou are correct King Manwë. Let there be no more marring of hearts or lands.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Aulë
Aulë: (to all) None of the Noldor has mentioned him.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Mandos and Nienna
Mandos: (to Aulë) What of Fëanor and Finwë?
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Varda
Varda: (to Aulë) How is King Finwë? I was saddened when he decided to go into exile with Fëanor.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Aulë, Yavanna, Tulkas and Oromë
Aulë: (to Varda) Finwë does well at Formenos, as does his seven grandsons that also chose to be in exile with Fëanor. The leadership of the Noldor in Tirion is in Fingolfin's hands for the next seven years. Fingolfin is good of heart.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Varda and Manwë
Varda: (to Aulë) I would agree. He released Fëanor from his offence without hesitation.
Manwë: (to all) There must be a way to bring unity back to these who have lost it. A time of mending is at hand. The festival of first fruits should be the catalyst. We will speak of this more when we convene at the Ring of Doom at year's end.
DISSOLVE:
|
|
|
Post by Glorfindel on Jan 3, 2011 13:07:39 GMT -5
FINAL VERSION
Scene: 21 - Melkor at Formenos
DISSOLVE: EXT: Courtyard of Formenos MED. SHOT: MOVING SHOT: Maglor and Maedhros talk as they walk towards the entrance of Formenos.
Maglor: (to Maedhros) There is not much of an audience here.
Maedhros: (to Maglor, happily) When did you ever need an audience? Maglor, you have such melancholy of late. Music has always brought you much joy. What about the one about the Mindon or the Calacirya?
Maglor: (to Maglor, reflective) Ah yes, "The White Tower" and "Pass of Light" are nice. I guess I could play for you later, maybe a new song.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT CONT'D: Maedhros stops and wheels around quickly with his hand grabbing the hilt of his sword.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: He stares out into the distance
Maedhros: (to Maglor, low) That is odd, very odd. I felt as if someone was watching...
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Maedhros and Maglor
Maglor: What could it be Maedhros?
TWO SHOT CONT'D: He relaxes and slap/hugs Maglor
Maedhros: (to Maglor, smiles) I guess it is nothing, but let us go inside before you end up making a song called "Maedhros the Mad".
TWO SHOT CONT'D: They knock and the huge doors open. They enter in and the doors shut with a thud.
ZOOM OUT SLOW: MED: A few seconds after, there are knocks on the doors but no visible "knocker". There is a moment of silence followed by another series of louder knocks. The large door opens and it is Fëanor who opens it. His eyes widen as Melkor materializes.
Melkor: (to Fëanor) Greetings to thee, Fëanor, Curufinwë, Prince of the Noldor; are thou not blessed this day?
CUT TO: PAN UP: CLOSE UP: Melkor, tall and powerful looking.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Fëanor steps back from him cautiously.
Melkor: (to Fëanor) How are thee and thy house?
Fëanor: (to Melkor) Melkor...you have returned to Aman?
Melkor: (to Fëanor) Returned? I left not dear Noldo. I have been observing things as was my wont. Chiefly I have been watching thee languish in this land, and so I have come to visit a fellow sufferer that has been wronged by those who say that they love him.
Fëanor: (to Melkor, sarcastically) And so you have come to tell me that you love me more then they? (Pause) Why be concerned for me? Should not your concern be for yourself? The Valar would like to have you in their custody again.
Melkor: (to Fëanor) Of course they would, but why…for what offence? They have voiced their reasons, but there are still things they do not reveal. I have come with an offer of freedom.
Fëanor: (to Fëanor) What things, and an offer of freedom, what do you mean?
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Melkor
Melkor: (to Fëanor) Wise Fëanor, thou are the greatest of all the Eldar in Aman, yet treated now as if thou were of little value. I too have suffered from the jealousy of others. I sought to keep the fair lands of Middle-earth free for the husbandry of the Eldar. With a gentle hand, I wished to have governed from a great distance in the North, but the other Valar would not suffer me to do so. They made war against me and brought me here to be on a leash.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Fëanor and Melkor
Fëanor: (to Melkor) It is said that the Valar fought against you because you marred the land and killed many of the elves.
Melkor: (to Fëanor) Stories to propagate false ideas to those they wish to rule without question. For the truth be known, they desired the land that was promised to the elves. Long ago I drove them out of Middle-earth to this narrow land to keep Middle-earth safe for thy peoples’ coming. When they realized that the Eldar had awoken at Cuivienen, they sent the hunter, Oromë, to secretly terrorize them and trick them into coming to Aman. They wanted the Eldar near to their bosom, so that they could better control them. Middle-earth was left for the second comers.
Fëanor: (to Melkor) Second comers...I have had heard rumors whispered of such.
Melkor: (to Fëanor) They are a weak people. Although they resemble the Eldar in the basest form, they are slow of mind and fragile. Fated to be more easily controlled and manipulated by the Valar; they are usurpers of the inheritance that Illuvatar wished the Eldar...wished thee to have Prince Fëanor. Men they are called, and could easily be overcome and ruled by thy hand.
Fëanor: (to Melkor) I wish not to rule them, but I have desired for a long time to leave this place and visit Cuivienen where my people awoke. I would like to roam free in a wide land...
CUT TO: MED SHOT: Fëanor stands and looks down, deep in thought with his arms folded.
Melkor: (to Fëanor) Brave Fëanor, I can assist thee greatly in escaping from this narrow land to one that was intended for thee. Am I not still Vala? Yes; the greatest above all those who sit prideful in Valimar. Do not fool thyself that thou will ever again feel at home in city of Tirion.
Fëanor: (to Melkor) I have been pondering my return...how I will be received.
Melkor: (to Fëanor) I believe that thou have always known that this would never be thy true home; fair as the Valar have tried to make it seem. Thou are here for their benefit. If it is their liking and desire, they will put forth irresistible requests for the mightiest of thy works. Formenos is a strong place, but not strong enough to bar the Valar from taking the Silmarils for their keeping.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Fëanor looks up suddenly and his eyes flash and narrow. He looks hard at Melkor.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Fëanor's P.O.V.: Melkor fades to a grotesque, twisted, image of himself. A faint whispering is heard.
Melkor: V.O. (faint whisper) I want them, I will have the Silmarils. They will be mine!
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Fëanor and Melkor
Fëanor: (to Melkor, loud with anger) Your lust betrays you! How dare you come to my door with hidden desires for what is mine! Get you gone, jail crow of Mandos!
MED. SHOT CONT'D: Fëanor slams the door shut and the sound echoes.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Melkor is silent. He breathes deeply several times while frowning, and then he fades and floats away.
FADE TO BLACK:
|
|
|
Post by Glorfindel on Jan 7, 2011 11:56:34 GMT -5
FINAL VERSION
Scene: 22 - Searching for Signs of the Enemy
FADE IN: EXT: Plains of Valinor LONG SHOT: Three elves run fast across wide fields approaching Valimar/Valmar.
ZOOM IN: MED. SHOT: Shot zooms in, you see that it is Celegrom, Caranthir, and Curufin.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: The great gate (arch) of Valimar/Valmar. Three Valar (Yavanna, Aulë, Nienna) are passing through it. They stop as they notice the elves approaching.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: MOVING SHOT: Caranthir, Curufin and Celegrom come up the path to the gate, stop and then greet the Valar
Celegrom: (to the Valar) Lord Aulë, Lady Yavanna and Lady Nienna, bless you all.
Caranthir: (to the Valar) Important tidings come from Formenos. Melkor has been seen.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Nienna
Nienna: (to all) Important tidings...ill tidings would be more appropriate.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Aulë Aulë: (to elves, shocked) Melkor at Formenos, how surprising! What did he want?
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Curufin
Curufin: (to Aulë) He came and spoke to father a day ago. Father became upset and shut the door in his face. King Finwë is concerned and sent us to report all to Manwë.
CUT TO: MED SHOT: The Three Valar
Aulë: (to himself, to all) My, my, how surprising indeed my Noldor! The door shut in Melkor's face; I wish I was there to see the look he...
Yavanna: (to Aulë, interrupting) Aulë, this must be reported to Manwë quickly.
Nienna: (to Yavanna and Aule) Yea, let us be off.
Aulë: (to the elves) My Noldor, go to Oromë's Mansion. He is yet on Taniquetil but ye ask of the Maia for horses and ride forth to Manwë. Shortly, I will go speak with Finwë and Fëanor.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: The Valar and the elves depart DISSOLVE: LONG SHOT: The elves riding up the holy mountain as the Vanyar elves look on. Montage: Sounds, music and no dialog MED SHOT: The riders are seen speaking to Manwë and Varda with Oromë and Tulkas near. Then Nahar's hoofs with flames are seen as the host of Oromë speed down the mountain. CUT TO: MED SHOT: Tulkas talks to elves in Tirion and then runs swiftly away. CUT TO: MED SHOT: Back in Manwë’s Hall on Taniquetil. Tulkas and Oromë come in.
MONTAGE ENDS: Manwë’s mansion CUT TO MED SHOT: The Valar (Manwe, Varda, Yavanna, Nienna, Tulkas, Oromë) gathered
Tulkas: (to Manwë) In Tirion, they saw a thunder cloud pass by the hill of Tuna heading for the coast.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Oromë
Oromë: (to Manwë) I rode to Alqualondë and it seems that he turned northward, but there was no sign of him for many leagues.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Manwë
Manwë: (to all) He has more likely ventured to the north and hopes to cross over to his former strong hold in northern Middle-earth.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Tulkas and Oromë
Tulkas: (to all) If this is true, then good riddance to that scoundrel!
Oromë: (to all) We can only hope that he has difficulty there and is unable to cause much mischief. Now, with his departure, we can focus of the celebration of first fruits. Year’s end is near.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Manwë deep in thought
FADE TO BLACK:
|
|
|
Post by Glorfindel on Jan 7, 2011 12:21:06 GMT -5
FINAL VERSION
Scene: 23 - Aulë at Formenos
FADE IN: INT: Vast Dwelling of Formenos. Well designed but sparsely decorated. TWO SHOT: MOVING SHOT: Aulë walks with Finwë down a hall
Finwë: (to Aulë) With Melkor gone, the outlook on affairs should improve for all in Valinor. I am sure that Fëanor would consider coming to the festival, if kindly asked.
Aulë: (to Finwë) Yea, Melkor’s departure brings much relief, but a command does Manwë give to Fëanor.
Finwë: (to Aulë) This will not sit well with him.
Aulë: (to Finwë) The deeds of his pride have brought this forth. Can you guarantee his presence?
Finwë: (to Aulë) At this point in time...I cannot say.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Aulë and Finwë enter into a large room with many work tables and benches. Curufin, the twins, and some other elves are working on jewels or other creations. They all look up when Aulë and Finwë enter.
Aulë: (to all) Greetings my Noldor friends, glad to see so many busy with crafting.
All workshop elves: (almost in unison) Greetings Lord Aulë
Finwë: (to Curufin) Curufin, where is your father?
Curufin: (to Finwë) He is in the treasury.
CUT TO: MED SHOT: MOVING SHOT: Curufin looks behind him to a stone wall with a big thick metal door. Finwë goes to the back and opens the door. A bright light comes out suddenly.
Fëanor: O.S.V. (to Finwë) Father, I will only be a moment. I was doing a little reorganizing; separating the jeweled inlaid spears from the jewel studded staffs. With the Silmarils displayed, I never have to keep the door open for light or use my lamps.
MED SHOT: Fëanor makes his way into view from the back of the deep vault. The Silmarils are in an open crystal case.
Finwë: (to Fëanor) We must discuss this year's festival of first fruits.
Fëanor: (to Finwë, laughs) Why would I bother with that? I have no desire to go.
Aulë: O.S.V. (to Fëanor) But your desire has little to do with it Fëanor.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Fëanor with a grim suspicious look ANGLE ON: He puts the silmarils inside a thick iron casket and locks it. BACK TO SCENE: MED. SHOT: He comes into the workshop and closes the heavy door.
Finwë: (to Fëanor) Lord Aulë has said that you are to be at the festival, by command of High King Manwë.
MED SHOT CONT'D: Some elves in the room look on curiously
Fëanor: (to Finwë and Aulë) Let us go outside.
CUT TO: EXT. Fëanor walks between Aulë and Finwë outside near the Formenos entrance
Aulë: (to Fëanor) Manwë seeks to reverse the division of years past. The Valar require thy presence.
Fëanor: (to Aulë) I see…will this lessen my time away from Tirion?
Aulë: (to Fëanor) Nay, but it will better thy return when that day comes.
Fëanor: (to himself, to all, lowly) They treat the maker of seeing stones and Silmarils strangely.
Aulë: (to Fëanor) Be humble and comply. Much pride and impatience is bad for all, no matter the intentions.
CUT TO: FLASH BACK: - Aulë reminisces in his own mind. He is crafting small, stocky, humanoid figures from stones. He then stands them up; they are polished and clothed. He looks intensely at a few and mumbles, moving his hands. The figures sound back and move in sync with his hands. Then there is a loud rumble; the room is lit with a bright light. FLASH BACK CONT’D: Aulë: O.S.V (to Fëanor) Illuvatar shows us the error of our ways for our benefit, no matter who we are and what great achievements we have done or hope to do.
FLASH BACK CONT'D: Illuvatar: O.S.V. (to Aulë) Why have thou done this, a thing that thou knows is beyond thy power and authority to do? Thou have only thy own being from me and these creatures of thy mind can only live by that being and not independently. Cease thy thought on them and they will cease moving. Is this what thou desired?
FLASH BACK CONT'D: Aulë: (to Illuvatar) No, I did not desire this; I just wanted things other than myself to teach and love. With impatience for the coming of thy children I did this; not in mockery, but because thou have placed skill, imagination, and creativity in my heart. I wish to help populate Arda, for much room is there and yet none occupy and enjoy it. In my impudence I have now fallen into folly. What shall I do so thou will not be anger with me forever? (Pause) As a child to his father, I offer thee the work of the hands that thou have made.
FLASH BACK CONT'D: Aulë grabs a hammer: Aulë: (to Illuvatar) Do with them what thee wilt. (pause) But should I not destroy the work of my presumption?
FLASH BACK CONT'D: He cries as he raises the hammer and the dwarves finch and cry out.
FLASH BACK CONT'D: Illuvatar: O.S.V. (to Aulë) Stay thy hand, for I accepted thy offer even as you spoke it. Because of thy humility and love, I now imparted onto these that thou made, their own independent life, but no further shall I amend thy work. I also will not suffer them to be alive on Middle-earth before my children, and know that strife may arise between those I birthed and those I have adopted. Let them sleep in the earth, under stone and mountain for now. FLASHBACK END:
CUT TO: EXT: Small hill down a path from Formenos MED. SHOT: Aulë, Fëanor, Finwë. Aulë is still in deep thought about the past.
Finwë: (to Aulë) Lord Aulë, you were saying?
Aulë: (to Fëanor, scratching his head) Oh, there is an order...to all things Fëanor, as thou well know. Thy sentence draws near the halfway mark. Do not jeopardize thy standings now. I have come to tell thee of the command as friend of the Noldor, less Manwë send Eonwë with other Maiar to escort thee. Please be there at the appointed time.
MED. SHOT CONT'D: Fëanor stands away from Aulë and Finwë with arms folded and frowning.
Fëanor: (to both) It will be so.
FADE TO BLACK:
|
|
|
Post by Glorfindel on Jan 7, 2011 14:17:51 GMT -5
FINAL VERSION
Scene: 24 - The Death of the Trees
FADE IN: EXT: Manwë's mansion on Taniquetil, central courtyard. MED. SHOT: PAN ACROSS: Vanyar singing and some dancing. Noldor are showing off jewelry and clothing. Fingolfin and others eat and drink. Manwë, Varda and many other Valar are sitting and enjoying.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Manwë and Varda
Varda: (to Manwë) Lovely is this day my king. Joy is everywhere and many more Eldar attend this year's festival than ever before.
Manwë: (to Varda) Yea Varda, I am pleased. It seems all but the Teleri from the shores have come.
TWO SHOT CONT'D: Manwë and Varda smile and look out at the festivities. CUT TO: LONG SHOT: Turgon and Elenwë walk through the crowded courtyard. They approach Fingolfin and Anairë who are standing near Indis. Turgon and Elenwë bow and are greeted.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Turgon and Elenwë
Turgon: (to all, to Fingolfin) I extend greetings and blessings to you, my family. Father, Fingon should be here soon with Aredhel. Your granddaughter Idril is helping her Vanyar kin support the ongoing celebration.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT CONT'D: Indis turns to Elenwë and smiles
Indis: (to Elenwë) Come with us Elenwë, and let us mothers talk. I have longed to talk to you about...more great-grandchildren. [Laughs]
MED. SHOT CONT'D: MOVING SHOT: The males have smiles on their faces. The three ladies laugh and smile as they start to walk through the courtyard towards large archway on the other side.
Elenwë: (to Indis, laughing) One is not enough I suppose?
Anairë: (to both lighthearted) No, it is not; and me, with only one grandchild? You and Turgon do us such a disservice.
Indis: (to Elenwë, smiling, laughing) Yes indeed. Elenwë, you have done so well with your daughter Idril; why not continue such fine crafting? PAN ACROSS: Down a pathway to the entrance. Slowly an elf walks into the celebration area but remains on the outer perimeter, almost hidden in gray plain clothes.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Mandos approaches Manwë with Eonwë by his side.
Mandos: (to Manwë) He is here King Manwë.
Manwë: (to Mandos, to Eonwë) Very good; Eonwë, please have Fëanor come forth to me.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Celebrators start to notice that it is Fëanor in the gray clothes. They whisper among themselves about his lack of any festive clothes. Eonwë approaches him.
Eonwë: (to Fëanor) Manwë requires your presence now.
CUT TO: EXT: Fields and plains of Valinor. LONG SHOT: Two large and dark figures are crossing over the empty land. They are shown headed in the direction of Valmar and the two trees.
CUT TO: MED SHOT: Outer edge of the city of Valmar. Mahtan is walking in deep thought. He senses something and looks out through the gate (archway) to the two trees. After pausing and looking for a few seconds, he continues past the gate (archway).
CUT TO: INT: Manwë's mansion. LONG SHOT: Singing dies down as the elves make way for Fëanor to come forward
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Fingolfin follows Fëanor from a few steps behind and then both stop and stand a short distance from Manwë.
Manwë: (to Fëanor) Fëanor, son of Finwë, greetings to thee...and to thee also Fingolfin who rules in Finwë's stead; I pray that ye both are well.
Fingolfin: (to Manwë, bows) Yes Lord Manwë, greetings to you from the Noldor of Tirion.
DISSOLVE: EXT: The two trees on the hill of Ezellohar MED. SHOT: MOVING SHOT: Slowly and menacingly, darkness (black shadow and smoke) creeps up the side of the hill to the base of the trees.
CUT TO: INT: Manwë's Mansion MED SHOT: Manwë, Varda, Fingolfin and Fëanor
Manwë: (to Fingolfin) Bless thee Fingolfin, but I had hoped Finwë would come and that he would take up his Kingship again, though thou have done very well in his absence.
Fingolfin: (to Manwë) Finwë chooses to remain at Formenos and considers himself "unkinged" until this matter has concluded.
Varda: (to Fëanor, concerned) What say thou Fëanor; now that thy term in exile nears half done? And thou come not in festive apparel, wear not any jewel, nor bring us the blessing of the Silmarils' light?
MED. SHOT CONT'D: Fëanor is silent
Fingolfin: (to Manwë and Varda) Fëanor's heart is ever with our father. His appearance reflects the diminished splendor of our spirits because of the absence of Finwë.
Manwë: (smiles a Fingolfin, raise an eyebrow at Fëanor) Thy sentence completion is not as far off as it seems Fëanor. Soon you will be release to house and forge in Tirion, but before that event, I hope that healing will have started in the hearts of all concerned.
Fingolfin: (to Manwë, turns to Fëanor) And it is so Eldar King. As I said a time ago, I do now. (to Fëanor) I release you from any further grievance.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Fingolfin extends his hand and Fëanor takes it.
Fingolfin: (to Fëanor) Half brother in blood, but full brother in heart will I be. You will lead and I will follow. Let no new grievance divide us.
Fëanor: (to Fingolfin) I hear you, so be it.
CUT TO: LONG SHOT: The mingling of the light of the trees can be seen as the two brothers shake hands. The elves cheer, sing, and music starts.
CUT TO: EXT: The two trees MED. SHOT: Black Ungoliant hiding behind Melkor.
Ungoliant: (to Melkor, upset) So bright, accurse things of the Valar! Hate I have for these two, yet I desire them more!
Melkor: (to Ungoliant and in thought to Manwë) Manwë calls for festival, as is his practice at the gathering of the first fruits. The cities and lands are now emptied during the celebration, who can challenge us? His sympathies and compassion is his undoing. See now my brother Manwë Súlimo, finally, recompense.
MED SHOT CONT'D: Melkor takes a long thick black spear that has been strapped to his back, and thrust it into Telperion. The tree leaves shake and the bark cracks. He does the same to Laurelin. The trees sway and their light dims and brightens over and over as sap oozes from their wounds. Ungoliant comes quick and starts to suck it up.
CUT TO: IMED. SHOT: MOVING SHOT: Manwë's mansion. Yavanna and Nienna come close to Manwë Nienna: (to Manwë, starts to cry) Something is wrong dear Elder King.
Yavanna: (to Manwë, very concerned) King Manwë, I too feel a burden suddenly upon my heart.
MED. SHOT CONT'D: It starts to grow dark. The elves are silent and look confused.
CUT TO: EXT: The two trees CLOSE UP: Ungoliant is sucking the sap of Laurelin ZOOM OUT SLOW: Telperion is already dark and black; Ungoliant finishes sucking Laurelin
Ungoliant: (to Melkor, excited) Oh, yea, yea, it is finish! We should not risk more damage less the Valar finally descend on us and bind us! The Valar are strong; they who brought even thee into captivity!
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Melkor moves closer to Ungoliant Ungoliant, I did not search thee out in the forgotten land of Avathar to stop at the half mark! See these pools of light? They also must be dimed. Is thy hunger now sated?
Ungoliant: (to Melkor) My hunger remains, but these pools are not enough to risk the wrath of the Valar!
Melkor: (to Ungoliant) So, will thy greed for more help you overcome thy fear? After these pools, there is more, much more for thy belly to feast on. In the northern regions of Valinor is a stronghold, wherein unsurpassed jewels and containers of light are kept. Those I will hand over to thee.
Ungoliant: (to Melkor) Yea, with both hands Lord Melkor?
Melkor: (to Ungoliant, smiles grimly) Indeed, Ungoliant, with both hands.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: MOVING SHOT: Ungoliant goes to the shining pools, belching black ink like vapors as she moves. It is like dusk in the land with it getting darker as Ungoliant drinks up the pools and belches black vapors.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Melkor nervously watching her grow larger as she drinks. When she finishes, she is huge and hideous.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Ungoliant
Ungoliant: (to Melkor, loud, upset) More, Melkor, more!
CLOSE UP CONT'D: Fading light with Ungoliant eyes shining
FADE TO BLACK:
|
|
|
Post by Glorfindel on Jan 10, 2011 15:18:00 GMT -5
FINAL VERSION
Scene: 25 - Chase of the Valar
FADE IN: INT: Manwë's mansion MED. SHOT: MOVING SHOT: Manwë makes his way through dismayed and frightened celebrators to an area where he can look out toward the trees.
CUT TO: EXTRA LONG SHOT: Manwë’s P.O.V.: Valinor as seen from Taniquetil. It is dim and growing darker with the stars shining overhead. A dark liquid blackness is slowly flowing over the land. Manwë tries to see where it is coming from and spots a darker point moving away fast.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Manwë
Manwë: (to himself, very grim) Melkor.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: MOVING SHOT: Oromë mounting Nahar ANGLE ON: Bright flames leap from Nahar’s hoofs BACK TO SCENE: MOVING SHOT: CONT'D: Oromë leads his host down the mountain. Tulkas runs pass Oromë going headlong into the evil darkness.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Tulkas searches for Melkor in the darkness
Tulkas: (to Melkor and himself, loud) What evil tricks thou have will not save thee Melkor. I will yet lay hands on thee again!
MED. SHOT CONT'D: The darkness seems to become semi-solid and attacks Tulkas. He is buffeted around slightly as he runs. He slows down and swings in the air at the blackness.
Tulkas: (loud, angrily) Melkor! Melkor!
CUT TO: LONG SHOT: Oromë and his host closing in on the "extra" darkness.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Oromë slows down. The "extra" dark (vapor like) surrounds him and his host. He tries to sound the Valaroma (horn) but the sound is muffled and muted. His host started to scatter into the darkness confused. He tries the Valaroma again but only the sound of air comes out with no note. Slowly the "extra" dark starts to fade and seem to move away. A soft breeze can be heard and seen. Oromë's host gathers back to him and then Tulkas comes up slowly.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Oromë on Nahar and Tulkas
Tulkas: (to Oromë, frustrated) It is no use. I have lost all bearings on his direction.
Oromë: (to Tulkas) Then let us return to Taniquetil.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Oromë turns and leads his host away as Tulkas looks up to the stars. PAN UP SLOW: to the stars
FADE TO BLACK:
|
|
|
Post by Glorfindel on Jan 10, 2011 15:19:51 GMT -5
FINAL VERSION
Scene: 26 - Sorrow and Woe
FADE IN: EXT: Manwë's mansion MED. SHOT: Star filled sky PAN DOWN SLOW: to Manwë and the other Valar receiving report from Oromë and Tulkas.
Oromë: (to all) And by the time it subsided so that we could reset our pursuit, he had gone.
Nienna: (to all, with tears) From bliss to woe completely we have come. The trees are now darkened.
Varda: (to Manwë) We should make way to Ezellohar, to the trees.
Manwë: (to all) We will gather to the green mound; let everyone govern their grief until full assessment is wrought.
CUT TO: LONG SHOT: A huge precession makes its way down from the Taniquetil; only the brilliance of the Ainur shines dimly.
DISSOLVE: MED. SHOT: They all arrive at the green mound, now muddied and heavily trodden. Yavanna and Nienna approach the trees. Yavanna reaches to touch a branch. ANGLE ON: Yavanna's hand and the branch breaking and crumbling in her hands. BACK TO SCENE:
Yavanna: (to all, sad) The light of the trees has passed away, and lives now only in the Silmarils of Fëanor. Foresighted was he. Even the mightiest under Illuvatar can accomplish some work only once. I brought the light of the trees into being, but I can never do so again. If I have just a little of that light, I could recall life to them before their roots decay; healing our hurts and confounding Melkor's malice.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Fëanor standing in front of the Manwë, Varda, and Mandos
Manwë: (looking at Fëanor) Hear thou Fëanor, the words of Yavanna? Will thou grant what she would ask?
MED. SHOT CONT'D: Silence ensues for a few seconds as the wind blows gently but enough to make the tree branches creaking. Other Valar join the three Valar near Fëanor.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: The face of Fëanor
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Faces of Valar PAN ACROSS: the faces of the Valar who all, but Aulë, stare at Fëanor.
PAN STOP: on Tulkas
Tulkas: (to Fëanor, upset) Speak, o Noldo, Yea or Nay! But who shall deny Yavanna?! Did not the light of the Silmarils come from her work in the beginning?!
Aulë: (to Tulkas, compassion) Be not hasty; we ask a greater thing than thou know. Let him have peace yet for a while.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Fëanor
Fëanor: (to all, frustrated) For the less even as for the greater, there are some deed that he may accomplish but once only. And in that deed his heart shall rest. It may be that I can unlock my jewels, but never again shall I make their like. And if I must break them, then I will break my heart, and be slain, first so of all the Eldar in Aman.
Mandos: O.S.V. (low and solemn) No…not the first.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Manwë and Varda quickly look around at Mandos with very concerned looks. Mandos stares back in silence. It is quiet with only the creaking sound of the dead trees being blown gently by the wind.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Fëanor with arms crossed and head down. He thinks to himself and his thoughts can be heard by the audience only.
AUIDO F/X: Fëanor: (INTER-THOUGHT) O.S.V. - Melkor: "You are here for their benefit. If it is their liking and desire, they will put forth irresistible requests for the mightiest of your works. Am I not still Valar? Yes..."
V.O. - Fëanor: Yes...and thief shall reveal thieves.
MED. SHOT CONT'D: Fëanor looks up suddenly, throwing his arms to his sides.
Fëanor: (to all, low but angry) This thing I will not do of free will, but if the Valar will constrain me, then shall I know indeed, that Melkor is of their kindred.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Mandos as Vairë walks up and stands beside him
Mandos: [loud and deep] Thou have spoken.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Nienna moves to the trees as she cries. She cast back her grey hood and knells near the trees roots. Her tears drip on the roots of the trees and start to wash the blackness away. ZOOM OUT SLOW: She sings softly as she weeps. Then there are loud commotions in the background of the crowd of Eldar as three elves make their way to the base of the mound.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Maedhros is in front followed by Amrod and Amras. They try to make their way to Manwë but are stopped by Eonwë. Nienna stops singing
Maedhros: [to the Eonwë] I must speak to King Manwë. I have...ill...ill tidings from Formenos.
MED. SHOT CONT'D: MOVING SHOT: Fëanor, surprised, tries to make his way to them. Eonwë look at Manwë ANGLE ON: Manwë holds his hand up and signals for them to let the group through. BACK TO SCENE: MED SHOT: The crowd starts to grumble as Fëanor meets Maedhros.
Fëanor: (to Maedhros, concern) What of Formenos, what tidings Maedhros? Where are your other brothers?
O.S.V.: Manwë: (to Maedhros, loud and clear causing silence) Please tell us in full what tidings thou bring us at this dark hour.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Maedhros
Maedhros: (to all, sad) It us evil news I bring, great lords of Arda, evil deeds done while darkness prevailed over the land. The light of the trees...
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Maedhros pauses, looks to the trees and is further saddened and dismayed by the sight. He gathers himself and continues.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Maedhros
Maedhros: (to all, sad and dismayed) ...the light faded, dimmed, how could that be...but yet we witnessed it from the hillside near Formenos. Then, even as the light of the trees seemed to fail, "darkness" was spied coming towards us from afar. It was darkness, large and of its own independent will. From this issued forth...more darkness. We all sensed a great power in the midst of it and then discovered Melkor coming along side of this thing. He soon approached the doors of Formenos and we all fled...all but...King Finwë. (Eyes tear up but do not cry)
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Maedhros and Fëanor
Fëanor: (to Maedhros, excited and upset) What of my father, King Finwë? What of his fate?!
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Now Fingolfin and his children come close to the speakers. Finarfin comes holding his mother with her head lying on his shoulder crying quietly.
Maedhros: (to Fëanor, very sad) He stood firm and tall before the doors of Formenos. His face showed bright even amidst the darkness. Melkor spoke to him and demanded that you come forth. Maglor, Celegrom, and I resolved to go to back to the doors from our sheltered place behind the rocks, but as we readied ourselves, we saw that King Finwë had refused to answer Melkor questions. So Melkor struck him down with his black spear, broke wide the doors of Formenos, and entered in. The darkness, which seemed alive, put forth more thick darkness, and confused our direction. It was like vapor, mist, smoke and much more in one hideous form. When it had passed enough to see...Melkor and "it", had left.
CUT TO: MED SHOT: Manwë, Varda and Mandos
Manwë: (to all) More burdens to bear from this evil. Has the bottom of this bitter cup been yet reached?
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: Maedhros and Fëanor
Maedhros: (turns and hugs Fëanor) Father, Maglor and the others gather around Finwë, though his spirit is in the Halls of Waiting. They also stand guard over what little remains in the treasury. Father, the jewels of Formenos, all...are gone.
TWO SHOT CONT'D: Fëanor seems to go limp in Maedhros's arms with a shocked, wide-eyed look on his face. Then he stiffens himself and blinks very quickly.
Fëanor: (to Maedhros, confused and upset) Do you speak of the Silmarils Maedhros...of the Silmarils fate Maedhros, not them too?
Maedhros: (sad and now crying) Yes father, the Silmarils have been stolen by Melkor. They are lost to us now.
CUT TO: CLOSE UP: Fëanor's Face. Fëanor's eyes narrow and spark as if flame were inside them. He trembles suddenly and breaks from the embrace.
CUT TO: MED. SHOT: Fëanor turns to the Valar and looks at Manwë
Fëanor: (to all, shaking, furious and loud) Curse Melkor! Curse his name! Evil is that name and I shall never have it on my tongue again. Black and dark are his heart and soul. Morgoth, the Black Foe of the world I name him and so shall he ever be! Curse this unholy day and all that encompasses it! Evil was the summons that brought me away from Formenos. Would I have been there to contest Morgoth; I would have struck a blow mightily upon him. Unholy and depraved were all the designs that allow Morgoth to ravage my works, and kill my father!!
MED. SHOT CONT'D: Then Fëanor swiftly runs through an opening in the crowd into the outer darkness and disappears. Everyone has a sad face, is tearing up or crying out loud. A few elves are passing out touches and the crowd of elves slowly starts to leave.
CUT TO: TWO SHOT: ZOOM OUT SLOW: Aulë holding Yavanna's hand. She looks at the trees sadden. She moves back to them and knells near their base. Torch lights are seen scattered over the land. ZOOM OUT: Pass the Calacirya to the wailing Teleri in Alqualondë.
FADE TO BLACK:
|
|
|
Post by tamitha on Jan 19, 2011 21:44:29 GMT -5
Hello, Frodo! It's your long lost Sam. I am just beginning to be strong enough to emerge from the Golden Wood and Galadriel's constant care. I still visit with her twice a month, but able to stand on my own more and more. I have an awesome job at an awesome law firm with only eight employees counting the attorney. They are a great group and we are more like a little family. I'm still overloaeded with school work, the Ainu are now forcing Statistics down my throat, but after failing the class last semester and retaking it this semester I have all 100's so far. So between my weakend state of being, complicated legal terminology and y=x(fx+x-b)(fx squared/s) square root of sum blah, blah, blah my head stay sorta foggy most of the time, but I managed to read through up to page 4 before my eyes started getting heavy and my mind started wandering. I really like what I've read so far. I'm very impressed and so sorry I haven't been present. I can only imagine how loney it has been for you here all alone, although it appears HV was around for a while and I take it your family has been of much assistance. I guess I do have a question, not that I saw anything that jumped out at me, but are we allowed to make suggestions or request changes? I noticed these were titled Final Version and got the impression that you were not open to making changes. Also are the story boards up and if so where have implanted them or are you strictly working on the script and plan to do the story boards later? As I said in my PM I am in hopes of being well enough by the summer to engage with you more as I should have more time since I am not going to be taking summer classes this year. Otherwise I'm not prepared to comment much more since I haven't read past page 4 for one thing and I'm not sure what type of input you are willing to receive for another. I've been checking in every night and unless I get too bogged down in homework plan to continue to check in at least until I hear back from you. I don't think you have reached the conclusion just by skimming so I expect you will be back sometime soon. Hope you don't have a heart attack that you've had a visit from your much absent friend/co-writer/football fan.
|
|
|
Post by Glorfindel on Jan 20, 2011 13:16:08 GMT -5
SAM!!!!! My word! Are you back?! Praises to Eru! I’m so happy to have you back even in a limited capacity. I’m glad that your work environment is great and I pray that it will continue to be so. Superb on your 100’s in school. Statistics can be a headache but I know that a “gardener” of you stature can conquer it.
Thanks for reading what you have of the script edit. What I have been trying to accomplish is a more stream lined version of the original, and make it more Elf centered. I have been watching a lot of old movies like the original “Clash of the Titans”, “Jason and the Argonauts”, etc. and I came to the conclusion that I didn’t want to see too much of the Valar. This is one of the major changes in the script. Most movies about “The gods and men” are shuffled between showing the adventures of men and then showing the gods and their thoughts and deliberations on what is going on. The formula is fine and one that works well if done right, but I wanted the viewer to feel a slight detachment between the two groups. This way the viewer would side with, or at least better understand, the Noldor leaving without thinking it was an outright boneheaded decision. Also, all the Valar expect Ulmo and Morgoth aren’t featured prominently in the rest of the stories, so I did not what to waste to much time on them. Some of what I cut out can be put back as flash backs in other films (Morgoth remembering, or Ulmo remembering/telling). I did leave a few scenes in with the Valar as long as they were short or they provided needed information that would seen off if someone else had provided it. I probably could cut another two to three scenes (with the Valar) out, but I got a little lazy all by my lonesome.
I don’t mind a few suggestions to improve the script or the flow of the story. I put “Final Version” because after a month or two waiting for anyone to comment, I needed to move on so I could start of the storyboards in earnest. I wanted to do the boards on a completed, edited script. I did not want to redo boards because scenes where changed or cut way later down the road. That’s too much work for a fun, non paying project, that has been essentially kept alive by one person. ;D
A good idea, is a good idea. If you think that you have one, please let me know but I will continue with my own edits so I can finally complete this process. I’m open to suggestion until I get to the end of my edit, which is about twelve scenes away. I post about two to three scenes a week, so…the end of February is what I’m shooting for. Any ideas will considered until then. Glad to have you back Sam. It is a belated Christmas gift ;D
|
|
|
Post by tamitha on Jan 20, 2011 21:43:24 GMT -5
It's good to be back if as you so aptly put it in a limited capacity. As long as I can stay on top of my homework I will try to read some of the book and then look at the script and see if there is anything I can add to enhance to scene, but I won't do any major overhauls. I know you have had to do all the heavy lifting, but again from what I have read so far you have done a superb job. It is much better than what you originally presented. In streamlining it you have also aged and matured it. What I have read so far is less comical and more serious, while have moments of comic relief which was one of my concerns with your rough draft. I'll do the best I can in the limited time you have given me, but worst case scenario maybe I can be of more help on the other three films we still have ahead of us. I really, really like your idea of flashbacks! Really wish we would have done as I once suggested and worked backwards. The Lord of the Rings is already done and I assume The Hobbit is still going to be coming out one of these days, so to tell the story of the Silmarils in reverse would have been so much simpler and reduced the need for so much detail, but the project was already in motion going forward from point zero long before I ever joined the project so it is what it is. I think you've come up with a perfect solution. Again if you haven't yet seen it I highly recommend watching Equilibrium. It has all the elements-a very long prologue, voice overs and flashbacks to flesh out a story without dragging it out, or giving too much detail or losing the intigue. I haven't read anymore this evening. It's late and I'm very exhausted and the weather is really bad here. Six inches on the ground and below zero temps tonight will turn it all to ice for the morning commute so I have to get early, so I'm going to cozy up with the kitties and get some sleep. It will probably be Sunday before I can get back here and maybe even next weekend because I may try to read some of the book before I comment further, but I will try very hard to stay close by. Thanks for sticking with it through long dark night! I'm proud of you!
|
|
|
Post by Glorfindel on Mar 21, 2011 10:17:00 GMT -5
Funny how time flies. I've been off the board for over a month and come back to find it...still the same. I have some personal issues to resolve and then I will be back full force. Until then..."all is quiet on the western front".
|
|
|
Post by Glorfindel on Apr 5, 2011 8:44:41 GMT -5
All is well...Scene 27 to be posted by the end of the month
|
|
|
Post by Glorfindel on Apr 30, 2011 20:46:50 GMT -5
It's the end of the month, but I don't have the next scene ready. I have been adjusting to a new job and in the gym, (lost 17 pounds, got 13 to go). I'll be back soon
|
|